Impressing A Stoner Chick


Your dream stoner chick may be elusive, but she’s not a unicorn. She’s a bonafide human with feelings, ideas, and jokes, and she might just be into you too. The problem is that this species is so cool and stoned that it makes them hard to read at times. “Does she like me, or just what’s in my roach clip?” Here’s how to be a smooth as Snoop and stoic as James Franco in front of that stoner chick you’re interested in.


Music Festival

Festivals are awesome because you’ll never be pressed so close up against strangers in such a non-confrontational way. Nothing is better for a stoner chick than knowing that her vibe has been acknowledged. Give her the nod by getting your friend circle to include her in the session your conducting just south of the moshpit.



Nature girls are a revelation when they are in their natural habitat of the deep mosquitoey woods. The great thing about this setting is that it’s self-selecting in that she wouldn’t be there if she didn’t already love it, and the woods are there just begging to be explored by a couple of punch-stoned-lovers. The only way to bungle this one up is if your spliff ends up starting a forest fire and you burn down her happy place.


Cannabis Event

With all of the commotion at an event, you will need to work extra hard to grab anyone’s attention. So, this is when you pull out the artisan joint you crafted during the pre-game. Ask her if she wouldn’t mind escaping from the chaos and joining you for a mellow one. Take Toronto’s infamous art roller, Cody Van Gogh, for instance. The guy has got his sculptural rolling game on lock, rolling superheroes, animals, the Trailer Park Boys, and even a music box. Tell me he hasn’t won over the heart of a girl once or twice with that skill! You know he’s the center of attention at every cannabis festival.


July 23, 2017

by Alana Armstrong

Profile photo of Alana Armstrong
Alana seeks to see cannabis from the perspective of politicians, advocates, entrepreneurs, and consumers. She got her start with a byline in the arts and culture section and crossed over into cannabis after using it medicinally. Current projects include investigations into cannabis and wellness; entrepreneurs of the Green Rush; cannabis for athletes; and the evolution of cannabis laws and culture in Canada.


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